Contrast on the Spiritual Path
How do we know the full experience of limitlessness without first experiencing limitation?
How do we completely understand being one in unity with all that is without first experiencing and knowing separation?
Contrast shows us the difference between the two through the physical experience.
One of the biggest questions I have stumbled across on the path is “now that I know I am limited, how do I cross over into expansion?”
To digress slightly, I remember reading in Soul Craft (written by Bill Plotkin) that just by setting the intention and making plans to undertake a vision quest, you have already begun it.
Similarly when you ask a question of the infinite divine universe and simultaneously hold a deep desire to know the answer you have set yourself on the path of learning. I always used to think the answer to would come to me plainly through a dream, I wished for something direct such as an angel or messenger to tell me the answer in plain english. In my experience, rarely is it this obvious.
The answers for me first came by simply being aware of my limitations. I was suddenly more aware of being afraid to be seen, being afraid to speak up, being afraid to rock the boat. I started to notice fears I had. Over time I wanted to challenge these fears. I had a fear of the dark, so I sat alone in the dark afraid until I wasn’t afraid anymore.
Since childhood I carried a fear of home invasion and only recently saw it as the irrational fear it was, yet it still felt so very very real. To move through this I felt a desire to have hypnosis which took me to the core of the fear and it cleared.
My polarities of absolutely needing to write contrasted by my fears of being seen caused me to shine light on these fears. I saw there was actually nothing there aside from a mild awareness that I will be judged. I am ok to hold this in my experience as my path takes me deeper and deeper to loving all beings for all that they are.
If I have learnt anything about fear, or any uncomfortable emotion for that matter, it’s that it requires a light to be shone on it and often to be felt through the physical body before it can be released. It is absolutely amazing how quickly some of them go when the determination to move through them comes.
As I explored my fear of rocking the boat, I started meeting people who are wonderful communicators and diplomats. They seemed to sail through conflict resolution with such love and grace that I was in awe. I surrounded myself with these people and soaked up everything they said to me. I watched them and absorbed all that I could. As time progressed I discovered a new trust in myself that I can apply these new skills of communication and lovingly navigate as best I can through any conflict that arises. It’s now ok for me to rock the boat.
Experiences and life lessons have also come to show me how to feel comfortable in my own skin, how to be ok with who I am as a sovereign individual in all my seemingly strange glory.
I now, simply by writing every blog that I do, step into the expansion of my limitation in question. I expand through my writing, through my being seen. To be limited is to be constricted and restricted by the fear. It stops action and creates paths that go in circles.
To step into expansion is to enter a path that is wide, supported and completely unknown. But exciting. Oh so exciting. I can’t think of any better way to describe it, other that expansive!
One of the scariest things I have ever done is to leave my relationship of 14 years that blessed me with 2 kids. It suddenly felt limiting to me. This was unbeknownst to me at the time and played out through toxic communication and sheer unhappiness on both sides. I knew something wasn’t right within me and it came out through ugly words and critics. It took courage to see that the answer was in leaving. It took a lot of courage to show that the only way for us to truly love each other was to be happy on our own separate paths.
It wasn’t until some time after separation that we both found exactly what we were looking for. It was rocky, sad and tumultuous but this is what expansion does. It shows you your limitations and urges you to go beyond them. It plays out through the physical experience of relationship, action, career etc. If you can see it for what it is, it makes moving through them so much easier. It allows one to see the bigger picture providing opportunity to walk through it with grace and love.
On the other side of separating with my husband, we have rekindled our love, although this looks much more different now. I love that he is happy and when I see him loving his life it fills my heart with joy. I understand when they say to love someone is to set them free and this included myself.
I feel expansive, I feel free and feel full of love and joy.
I never imagined that to get to expansion I had to walk through limitation but this is the paradigm of universal laws.
This is the beauty of contrast, it shows us simultaneously, what we need, what is lacking and how to get there.
If you could look into your life situations, what contrast would you find? What can you feel that you want to change? What do you feel limited by?
Ask the question with a deep desire to know the answer and it will come.